The funniest thing I have seen all day!


The funniest thing I have seen all day!

…This is….


to add to yesterdays police blotter from Atherton Ca… the thread… Just about the funniest thing i have ever read.

This is a long thread that i had to copy from reddit to be able to share with you, however, it is such entertainment, i was pushed over the edge of my yes decision to post it.  If your mind works anything like mine, then this will give you several SEVERAL good hard (possible hours) of laughs!!  I hope you enjoy it as much as i did!  Oh Atherton…….

(to be able to read this in a more cohesive format, go to reddit’s link here: )

[–]Freakazette 244 points 1 day ago

Some of these are even better if you read the ones right next to them. Like, the actual real crime makes some of these more ridiculous.

[–]Dustin- 241 points 1 day ago

Man stabbed in San Jose, injuries not life threatening.

In other news, a woman reassured a police officer that she knew her way home. Continue reading

Crime in Atherton. Grab some tissues… You are in for a bumpy ride!


If you happen to live in Atherton Ca. which happens to be the states 4th most expensive zip code (median home price is 4.9 million!), then it is no huge surprise that you have even less than first world problems.  You have maybe half world problems.  And when there is a problem… Who do you call?  The police of course.  Boy if i were a Santa Clara county deputy i really would love to be assigned this beat!  But only if i still had my patience and a serious sense of humor!


(To see the original article on the SFist, follow this link…

This was just too funny to pass up sharing with you all.  I have lived in the Bay area my whole life, growing up deep in the Santa Cruz mountains.  My dad’s business was over the hill and so we had friends over there.  I have always been familiar with Atherton.  I think my parents had friends that lived there (keeping in mind that this was in the 70’s & 80’s when it was really rich but the whole bay was much less populated than it is now).

In fact, life was much less complicated than it is now.  And much more connected.  Now days, fear is fed to us along with the ideals that beauty rules along with sex (however, it can not be talked about) and consumerism.

I dont think that in the days i was a kid that people living in Atherton were this incapable and terrified of… well… Anything that they might happen to come across.  I suppose that is reserved for our curent generations of frightened stiff un-functioned twits living in their walled manses afraid of the world and clearly delusionally entitled.

I would not like to see these people cope in a natural disaster where you are forced to rely on your friends and neighbors.  If this was survival of the fittest, these people would NOT survive.

It is funny but also just kinda sad, dont cha think?


If you want to know which SF neighborhood you would fit into…?


Tor Weeks Bikes of San Francisco

Then just check out this awesome poster Tor Weeks called Bikes of SF. And… boy it is dead on! And hilarious.

I wonder if she also straps her pet to the roof of the car to take on family vacations??

The typical Mitt Romney supporter i think.  We are in for a world of hurt if this is our future generation!!  Heaven help us!!!  No wonder China owns us!

And you thought it was tough to find an apartment to rent in SF? …here is the ultimate add for a room!

Found originally on Cl.  Then in’s site, here is (a presumed fake, but i actually can totally picture the room and situation and basically, that is the most honest post i have ever seen, so it should be real!).  Here is a little taste of what it is like finding or trying to find a place to live when the city you are in has less that 3% vacancy!

I have a shitty room available that no other people in the house want, hence the ad on CL.
I figure I can charge you more so the existing roommates can all pay less. I’ve actually been here for 8 years, so I’ll be making money off your rent.
It’s about 8×6, has a window facing a brick wall, and has no closet. The closet is down the hall, down a flight of stairs, … ah hell it’s in the garage.
Also, the room is not really a room, it’s half of a double parlour and your door is a sliding one that doesn’t close all the way. You can hear your roommate on the other side think.
We’re having an open house, so if you really like talking about yourself and giving us your life story while other strangers are present, you’ll be in your element.
One of our roommates is out of town, we would like you to skype with him a few days from now when we’ve picked some people out. Then after that we will narrow it down again to a select few (10) and meet next week for round two. We don’t have a life so we welcome the chance to have people over that show interest in us and praise our wonderful abode and everything about us, whether it’s sincere or not. Hey, a couple of us guys are single, so this could be a chance for us to score some dates. I don’t think that’s creepy at all.
We’d like your facebook and linkedin info. We feel that we can tell what kind of person you are and what you’ll be like, just from looking at how many friends you have online. There’s never been a better way to get to know someone.
Send us an email or go buy a lottery ticket – chances of getting the room are roughly the same.


There, I fixed it! Motorcycle win on the 505 south in calif.

Eye of a Needle

Ok… This is crazy! The artist must be a very little person with very little hands to be able to make these awesome sculptures in the eye of a needle!!  This takes a very particular mind and pair of eyes and hands to be able to create the below.  It is not me that is for sure! I say  Bravo!


These are great! Really clever photos from German ad campaign. I think you will like these!

This is one of the most creative methods of advertising I’ve ever seen. Jobs and lead creative advertising itself together.



Here is the Sexy Sax Man with a little Careless Whisper for your gay pride weekend!


If you havent seen the Sexy Sax Man, then your life has not been complete. This is a good video to keep around in a favorites folder, because it never is not funny. It can brighten anyones day!

AND… if you did not get enough in the first video, to dig a little deeper, here is some unreleased footage and behind the scenes to get to know the Sexy Sax Man a little better!

Happy Weekend all!

If you haven’t seen this video… You should! P.S. Watch the drummer!


I was shown this lil video last year by my now x-boyfriend. So, i did get something out of it! Just kidding. I wish him the best.

Anyway, this video is HILARIOUS!! The guys name is actually Steve Moore known as The Mad Drummer.

I crack up every single time i watch that video, but, in all fairness, this guy is Really Good!

And to prove it, here is a video without the awful ensemble!

My favorite kitty on the web… Meet Maru!


Meet Maru. It is the cutest (in my opinion) on the internet. It is prolific too! Because the owners are i believe Japanese, i can not understand all of the writing in regards to Maru. I dont even know if it is a boy or a girl. It is however, adorable!
Maru is a scottish fold kitty. Maru is also prolific with 788 videos on youtube.
This one is one of my personal favorites though. Gosh i love this kitty! So dang CUTE!
If you havent seen Maru yet, here is your opportunity to discover the cutest cat on the net!

My really Really bad day… part 2.

So, so far today, things have seemed to have reversed back to the hopefully smooth with good planning day with a little bit of smooth working luck.  A far cry from yesterday!

My day ended after a visit to my local dispensary (which i truly think is the one main thing apart from it being a beautiful and fairly warm non windy / foggy day that allowed me to get through it).  After sitting down for a few minutes and watching the Celtics vs. Miami game in the first quarter.  After chitchating about how tough it has got to be for all of the big basketball sized guys who were not born with gazelle like coordination with the guy that worked there, i left.  (I had a roommate like this who was 6’6″ and wore a size 16 shoe but had absolutely no coordination.  Poor guy!).

Anyway, i proceed to Big Lots where i quickly gobble up the items i needed (which happened to be things like laundry detergent and dish soap and condiments and bread mix etc.  Not light things.)  I decided that i would shop heavy and take the bus up to the top of the hill.  I threw my back out the day before and re-injured it that morning and was not taking any chances ascending 400 feet in less than 3 blocks with 4 heavy bags.

I was not in a hurry and knew that patience on a day this that was going to be the only thing that will allow me to get through it unscathed.  I walk out of Big Lots and check my Routsey app to see when the next MUNI was expected.  It said 22 minutes.

22 minutes eeh.  I have to walk a block and a half to the bus stop which would take about as long in minutes and then i got a good 19+ minutes to enjoy the sunset.

The bus stop is in front of the gas station on 30th and Mission, opposite the Walgreens. When the gas station changed hands about a year ago, a 7-11 went in.  This is a fantastic thing to come into this part of town.. Slurpees and good coffee and cheap(ish) cigarettes… a good combo!

I decided that this would be a perfect time to get myself a cup of coffee or hot chocolate for my nice late afternoon break/bus wait.  I set down my bags and proceed to make myself the most perfect afternoon cup of hot chocolate coffee!  It had it all!  1/2 & 1/2 a mocha creamer and a white chocolate creamer, a little sugar and 4 packets of non dairy creamer along with a good 2/3 colombian roast!  It looked to be the perfect dessert cup of afternoon coffee!  I paid and went to the bus stop.  There is a concrete shelf/wall/bench that holds the plantings in behind the bus stop that makes for a perfect little squat while waiting for the 24.  

Without ever taking a sip of the coffee, I go on knock it to the ground where it showered my foot and the right lower half of my body as well as the sidewalk.  I never got a taste.  I started to laugh.  I should have known.  It was visibly apparent that this was just another event in my highly jinxed day.  That was the prelude to the final injustice.  The 6 block MUNI experience (i can not bring myself to call it a ride.  It was so much more!  It only took about an hour and 10 minutes or so to get there.  Let me tell you.

note the flip flop

Ok.  sitting there with my spilled coffee and incredibly stick shoe and my bags of stuff.  I start talking with a couple of other locals about the egregious rental inflations and gentrification of the city which was good and bonding.  We needed this to maintain our victimized insanity that would soon unfold.

some of the cool locals in this MUNI mess with me.  and below, my bags remained unscathed!  Yea!

Ok.  Bus #1… The 22 minute bus.  I had been waiting for 22 minutes at about 5:45pm so needless to say, there were quite a few of us getting on.  It is also a big unboarding stop for the 24.  It is the last stop before it goes up and over Bernal to the Bayview so people who live east board, people who have come from Divisadero & Castro street usually most of them unboard here.  After awaiting the bus to unload, we start to board.  We get about 1/2 boarded and the driver tells us to unboard because he is taking that bus offline.  Another bus will be there soon.  He didnt know how long.

I descend the steps of the bus and in doing so, proceed to pull apart my flipflop at the toe.  Lucky for me though it was so sticky that it stuck to my goddamn foot and i made it back to the concrete bench.

I look on my Routsey app again and it says 5 min. and 6 min. are the next busses to be arriving.  I looked at that 6 min. bus but got once again caught up in conversation so when the 5 min. bus arrived, i got on it.

A wheel chair boarded and while this was happening, the 6 minute bus blazes around us.  I dont even know if he stopped at that stop.  I knew i should have tried to get on that bus!  So now the #3 bus was in position #2.  #1 was heading back to the barn.

We get the wheel chair guy boarded and proceed to wait.  And wait.  We probably were loaded onto the bus waiting for at least 8 stop light rotations.  A LONG time.  Finally the bus doors close and we wait about another minute and FINALLY finally turn the corner from 30th onto Mission.

We only go one block and turn left onto Cortland st… or so it was expected to.  We turn the corner and get maybe 2 bldgs. past the gas station and there is BUS #1 STOPPED ON THE SIDE!!  We couldnt believe it.  We pull up behind the first bus instead of getting into the left lane to turn left.

After a few seconds of talk between the drivers, we are informed that we must unboard and go across the street and wait at the stop at the corner of Cortland for the next bus.

If you want to see or hear a group of unhappy riders, i got a front row seat.  Me being one of them too, but, knowing how cursed i was doomed to be before the day even started, I felt almost responsible for all of these people being within the destructive radius of my jinxed luck of the day.  It must have been my doing!  It just doesnt take an hour and 4 busses to make it 8 blocks these days with MUNI. (in the 1990’s especially the early part, this would not have been too unusual).

Finally about 8 minutes and the 4th bus arrived and safely carried up the big ass hill to my final assend to my home.

I made it home finally and just started cracking up.  It was so bad of a day that it was humorous.  But just the little stupid things.  The big stressful things that went wrong got sorted out well.  It took a long time but things went better than expected when it comes to the shit that could have unraveled my life in the span of an afternoon.  It was this that was being worked on and could have gone either way.  I got really Really lucky!

Probably because of this, i took all the hilarious fails with a breath and patience and made it home FINALLY in one whole piece!  What a day!

I think today was doomed before it started. Let me just tell you…. Part 1.

I didn’t stand a chance today.  What a pain in the ass!  It started with my crazy little cat chasing flies or just going crazy and knocking over an open bottle and another glass onto my bed getting the covers soaking wet.

Then i proceded to go to the bathroom to find the toilet clogged.

I then proceeded to attempt to get online to no avail.  An hour and a half of unplugging and replugging and restarting.  Finally i called them and it turns out i need to pay them!  Go figure!

Which leads me to money.  I receive a direct deposit on the 1st every month and guess what… Today… not in account.

Which then proceeded to totally reconfigure my entire day.  Spent it on the phone for a couple of hours (at least 1/3 on hold) and in the office for over 3 hours.  About an hour and a half on bus riding not counting the MUNI comical nightmare that awaited me shortly.

I am so tired from this day, i am going to finish the other half of “how my bad day was so bad that it was starting to get funny to me”, tomorrow morning.  It will be cleaner and more witty if i finish after a little sleep.  So… stay tuned.  Part 2 will NOT disappoint i promise!  AND it will contain some of the photos of my misadventure.

I am hoping that when i wake up and finish up sharing with you my cosmic curse, i really hope it was like a 24 hour bug and it is not another Groundhog Day!

To be continued….

There are a lot of things that are wrong in this BART train impromptu dance performance! Ha!


First… Of the three ladies, there is one that is CLEARLY still in training. She (in the black pants) not only has two different colored sox and only sox on, but she is still learning about the words grace and elegance.

The second in abilities i would have to give it to the one with the boots on. She clearly has more skills and talent than her mismatched sock friend, but it seems a little odd that she came wearing a tutu! Like this was the big performance she got dressed up for!

Finally, The performer with the best chance of being a prime time dancer (pole? I didnt say it! It could be a circus with a pole!) is wearing a HELMET!! Probably in case of an untimely Bart emergency stop, she will not receive any severe head trauma, but i bet it is incase people riding bart start herdeling bottles and books and lunch bags at her while she is giving a spread eagle crotch shot split at the back half of the train.

Regardless, at least they were quiet and did not send around a collection helmet! Things could have been worse (although not for the poor uncoordinated chick in the black pants who Oh So wishes she was a headliner like her helmeted & tutu’d friends!)


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San Francisco’s best holiday… Bay to Breakers!

Today is the day when Halloween comes to San Francisco in May.  It is my still favorite holiday here in SF.  Partly because for almost 15 years the panhandle was my hood and one can not avoid B2B if living by the park.  It is/was also the one thing that until 2 years ago (the 100th bay to breakers they seriously tightened up the rules so that there could be no liquor or kegs, no nudity and i believe no floats. Boooo!!)  Regardless, it might be because a serious party starts at 7am, or that it is only us that are having a full on costumed holliday on a day in the middle of May, or maybe because it is a SF tradition that paraded itself through my neighborhood and i got front row tickets and the free afterparty to go to.  But I LOVE Bay 2 Breakers!!  Here is to you B2B!!


1980's b2b

Follow below link to see whole slideshow…

Best of Bay to Breakers.

the debate continues… Camel toe or Moose knuckle?

The Camel toe strikes again!

The dreaded camel toe!


This is really funny here this topic because it has been a running joke between myself and one of my former roommates/ current friends.

It has always been to my understanding that a WOMAN wears the camel toe.

The MAN wears the moose knuckle.

However… I have heard the term moose knuckle a lot lately.  Often to describe a women’s camel toe.  I believe that they are just missing the mark with their attempts to be hip to the slang… but others think differently.

For instance, Reader x says…

“Then again, there is this thought on the topic from another reader… “As a woman, I always thought cam toe was part of the reason for wearing tight pants. Just like cleavage is part of the reason for wearing a low-cut top.”


Another reader (we shall call him reader Y) shares with us…

“I’ve seen some toe that looked more like a knuckle personally. There was one time I think I almost went blind from it and told my friend that’s not a cam toe, it’s the whole damn foot!”

hahaha.  That is a good one reader Y!  f-u-n-n-y!

Now to all the ladies out there.  Since this is my forum to host, i am going to start and give a tiny piece of my own advice to you.

The camel toe should be avoided at all times.  And… Ladies, be a pal ok?  Let that friend that may be unaware that they are showing off their labia in silhouette.  They may be totally unaware!

It is just like how no body wants to see a dude in high cut mens short jogging shorts from the 80”s with no underwear, jog past you, as he blinds you with the blaring whiteness of a nut that flys up when he steps down with his left foot!  Same thing,  Leave a little mystery ladies!

Otherwise we all may go prematurely blind!

The only thing i can come to think of as a compromise is maybe a moose toe… If it is really that bad… I like camel foot better tho.

Hahaha.  Tell me what you think.  Is it a body is beautiful thing or is it a Hell No! issue for you?  Join in on the debate!

The Moose Knuckle

Moose Knuckle 2



*note.  This is an unusually raunchy topic for my blog i know, but this is a real issue! And it  needs to be discussed and clarified 😉

I found this in…


I found this in 2008.  It was elevated to status of “Best of Craigslist”.  I got together with my old roommate this week and he reminded me of it.  The computer i had it on, got stolen, so i had him re-send it to me so i can share it with you.  It is seriously one of the funniest things i have EVER read.  It NEVER gets old!  AND it is so ‘right on target’!  I hope you all enjoy a good chuckle like i am just posting it for you.  I wish i knew who this guy was.  I would find him and marry him!  Haha.

Image Detail

Coffee C*nt @ Royal Grounds

Reply to: 
Date: 2007-05-08, 3:01PM 

You came into Royal Grounds, Russian Hill 
You are the 30ish, 5’5″, 120#, “Blonde” girl with the spackled foundation and knock-off bronze-metallic Prada bag. You were on your cell, blabbing with an artificial “Laguna Beach” accent and blissfully absorbing the “attention” of everyone else in the joint. You’ve been in line for about eight minutes. 
I’d like to inform you of a few things: 
1. We are not staring at you because you are hot or cool, or interesting. We (read: everyone else in the joint) are trying make you burst into flames by focusing our searing hatred toward your shellacked mary-jane wedges. Believe me, most of us could care less about your insipid desperation to appear cool. We care much more about you leaving. Now. 
2. Royal Grounds does not serve “venti latte’s”. You’ve gotten all dizzy and come to the wrong place. You’re looking for McDonald’s, or Jenny Craig, or Fresh Choice. Stupid twat.
3. Make a decision before you get to the front of the line, bitch. I know… you’ve got low blood sugar so its haaaaard to decide, but settling on a fat-free muffin and a low-fat latte shouldn’t take one hundred twelve seconds at the counter. Especially since you’ve been in line for eight minutes saying, “I knoooow. Ohmigod, I KNOOOWWWW! Really? I know…”. Its not like you’ve been on hold with Comcast. You’re in line for coffee at 7:55am. Die. Now. Or at least spontaneously bleed or do something interesting and painful like a seizure. 
4. Leave a freaking tip. That little jar isn’t there to TAKE CHANGE FROM. If you need change for the bus, simply ASK the nice gal behind the counter. Don’t dig around in her tip jar for quarters while drawling about losing your Muni Pass to your feeble-minded phone-mate. We all know you lost your Muni Pass along with the tattered remnants of your shriveled dignity at the Royal Joke last night at 1:12am. It is just at the end of Bonita Street under that pile of wadded Kleenex. You know, near where you woke up, skank. 
5. Get your fucking bag off my table! Damn, now you’ve done it. You’ve taken me from focused disgust to personal rage. Just because I’m seated at the table next to the no-calorie sweeteners doesn’t mean I want your greasy, cum-stained whore-sack on my paper; nudging my coffee and getting dangerously close to contaminating my bagel. Not even an “excuse me” or a “do you mind/”. In fact, I might have let it pass with simple hatred had you bothered to engage some semblance of decency. But, there you go, no concern for my space or belongings. 
6. It was not an accident that my coffee “fell” onto your feet while you were adding the Spleda to your beverage. I purposely removed the lid. I carefully planned knocking it “just so” in hopes of getting at least one of your feet covered in scalding bean juice. Did that burn a little? Don’t worry about the shoes. Pleather cleans up nicely. The sugar should get nice and sticky soon. Kind of like your thighs and tits felt before you used a handi-wipe on them this morning when you came to. 
7. It was funny to watch you drop your phone into the bus-tray, prance on your little feet, and protest with “Ohmigod! Ohmigod!” while everyone else took delight in your suffering. Did you believe me to be sincere when I said, “Oh, wow. That must hurt.” Notice how I didn’t apologize? Of course you didn’t. 
8. Yes, I purposely chose that moment to get up and leave. I definitely meant to bump you ever so slightly with the table and knock your bag to the floor with my laptop and paper. I admit it: I wanted to cause you as much inconvenience as possible without actually breaking any laws. 
9. The people behind you in line were purposefully rude in pushing around you to get lids, sugar, cream and stuff. They grinned when they observed my work. They wryly smiled. They hate you as much as I do. Probably as much as your mother did when she dropped you off at the orphanage. 
10. Even though I had significantly slowed the pace of everyone’s day, there wasn’t a bit of anger directed at me. Rather, there was joy, gratefulness, even one woman who mouthed, “Awesome”. You are disgusting and unwelcome. Move away. Get crippled. Go blind. Just leave. 

  • it’s NOT ok to contact this poster with services or other commercial interests

And you thought it was a bitch to have to move!!

I would like to thank for allowing me to share a great photo essay showing what a re-development compromise (mind you a very VERY tiny victory for this poor Fillmore neighborhood destroyed by the SF Redevelopment Agency) can look like.  Pretty crazy to think of them up and moving these homes over several blocks so to be able to build the geary cut.  I also find it kind of interesting that they chose (at least a few of them) to be really unremarkable and plain victorians.  I know what this city has to offer and these have got to have been built with the low bargin bid developers because they are barely victorians minus the bay windows and the railroad flat floorplans, when i know that they demolished some beautiful full gingerbreaded doll houses and chose to save these.  Well… at least they saved something!

Anyway… on to the article (which you can see on its original site here (


Moving Victorians in the Fillmore


Unfinished History

In the mid-1970s the San Francisco Redevelopment Agency stopped the wholesale destruction of venerable Victorian buildings. Instead, they picked them up and moved them around the neighborhood. One well-known example is the building that housed Jimbo’s Bop Cityon Post Street which was moved to its current location on Fillmore near Sutter, housing Marcus Books.

In 1976-1977 Dave Glass took these remarkable photos of the Victorians on the move.







This is what Linkedin would have looked like in the late 80’s early 90’s! Funny and pretty spot on!


I remember in 1986 going to camp and they had a computer class. i was in it for two days until i switched to cooking. Programing DOS at 11 years old was NOT my thing! In fairness, i doubt it would be my thing today either. My brain needs to process more color! …enjoy!

Busted! 45 Mug Shots of Famous Musicians | Loaded | an blog

This is great!  Follow the link to see some unexpected mug shots from the great genre of music!  Thanks!

via Busted! 45 Mug Shots of Famous Musicians | Loaded | an blog.

prince mugshot... the good old days!

In homage to SF's own...

X Factor audition of Ant & Seb


The funniest audition ever EVER!! I have wanted to post this for a long LONG time.. It never gets tired or old…. Always makes me laugh a lot!!
I hope you enjoy it too!

This bathroom was just too funny to pass up sharing it with you!

We have this cute little shop down on Cortland St. that is a used kids clothing store.  In the very back of one side (they are in side by side storefronts that make up the store), they sell used womens clothes.   I love shopping in this secret little gem of ours but i never try anything on.  It is so cheap i just figure if it doesnt fit right i will just donate it back.

Anyway, one day i decided i had to see if these pants fit.  They were with stretch and i did not know if they would make it all the way around.  When i went into the bathroom, this is what i saw…

…With hand sanitizer and money for our tip jar!


Note.  Sign says please do not put paper in the toilet.  The water for the sink didnt work, BUT they did have hand sanitizer instead so everything is okay!  I also love the tip container.  I would put money on the fact that they put the money in to make people think it is the right thing to do….  I was cracking up!  Broken sink, broken toilet, hand sanitizer and a tip jar!  Perfect!

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