I started this blog as a neighborhood blog and posted on relavent things that i was interested in (Art and design and craft and clever things.) It quickly became an outlet for an extreem and sudden loss of my roommates kitty (who was mine by this time because she had adopted me almost immediately upon moving in 2 years prior and my roommate rarely came home). She was 19 so it was her time, but it was an incredibly sudden and violent death. VERY traumatizing. It all happened over about 20 minutes of horrific body spasms and drooling a lot of blood. The most heart wrenching yeowling in body writhing pain right on my bed in front of me. My roommate happened to be home at the time (OH THANK GOD!!) and we were all crying and screaming and telling her it was ok to let go and that we loved her.) She died in my roommates arms. Just where she should have because she was born not breathing and he breathed for her and she came to life and so i guess one could say it was full circle. Regardless, it was HORRIBLE to have had to watch. I was devastated as was everyone who witnessed it.
My blog now had turned into a healing and honoring device that helped me create closure with the loss. I also got my new little kitty Arthur 2 days after Tiki died. The loss of her life allowed me to save little Arthur who was slated to be put to death the following day at 3pm. I picked him up at 1pm. He was so terrified but has really come so far in just 3 short months. He now sleeps and hangs out on not under the bed and now has even let several people other than myself pet him. Every day or two i have a new breakthrough with him it seems. It is really rewarding. And as he becomes more comfortable he shows more and more of his personality. He is hilarious. A true character. More to come on this in the future, but i must get back to my original point.
I went to a great little store opening tonight down the street so i could check it out and do a posting on it (watch for it. I am going to go back and do some photographing without all of the people there to showcase this cool shop that sells electric bycicles) I asked someone who the owner was to get permission to take a few photos. I explained to him that i wrote a little blog. I may have even said neighborhood blog, but i realize that i have moved from writing and posting really relavent things to me, i had begun using it in a similar way to facebook. It was a depository of reposted blogs that i thought were interesting with a few personally written blogs intermixed. I think i needed to do this because not only was i mourning the death of our kitty but also two friends and an ended relationship of a year. I was really stressed out, scattered and depressed. The blog although was not my own writings as much, kept me still looking for things that impacted me in a profound enough way to believe it worthy of rebloging or posting.
There is nothing wrong with doing this. It creates a depository of relavent entertainment to the times pertaining to my life. A snapshot of culture from my perspective so to say. But when i started to think about it, i realized that there was no real common thread to my blog. I hadnt been writing as much about my city and neighborhood. It was and is kinda all over the place.
I may not correct this 100% but i think it is time for me to really figure out what this blog of mine is all about. Is it a sort of therapy? Is it a modern culture statement? Is it a design and art/craft showcase? Is it a way to have a voice in this ever failing time? I dont know, but i promise this to all of you sweet people who have followed the hodge podge of interests posted here so far, that I am going to start really writing again here. In a sense it is going to also be part online journal. A way for me to think aloud.
This works well in two ways. First, i will not ever have to worry about another house fire putting my journals at risk or a move losing them, and second, i can write a lot more before my hands begin going numb while typing than writing. I will still keep journals. That will never leave me, but i am going to trust in the readers that they will accept my writing as a thank you to them listening to my thoughts.
It will also continue to be a neighborhood blog as well as a city blog. However, i havent wanted to start getting too upset and angry in my observations, and lately, that has been the thoughts associated with things that i see happening in this (once) GREAT! and now Good city of San Francisco (see posting on Sherif Ross Mirkirimi’s political witch hunt). So i am going to write what i am pondering and what i feel and what i see around me and what i discover, and who i am.
I just thought that of this leap year with the Mayan calendar ending and all, i would begin to clarify my direction hopefully to both you all and to myself.
I look forward to seeing whats in store for us! I hope you are too.